Loss is not an easy thing to deal with. If you knew me really well, you’d know that life has dealt me a lousy hand in the health department. Not that I have ever let it bother me unduly. Recently I developed a heart condition called Atrial Fibrillation which side- lined me for a while. And I began feeling sorry for myself and saying why me? With all my health conditions why did the powers that be pick on me?
Many of us who have been in therapy would be familiar with the phrase ‘ working on yourself ‘ and that is what I have been doing. Trying to work on myself in the middle of all my physical and mental turmoil was challenging, but I did not stay in the doldrums for long.
And after reading Jon Morrow’s blog today I feel quite ashamed of myself.
There is always someone much worse off than you.
I guess it wasn’t the physical condition that shocked me so much as coming to terms with loss. Loss of youth, loss of control and yet another loss in the health department.
Loss is a great equaliser.
It reminds us that we are not omnipotent. It cuts through our defences leaving us sensitive, vulnerable and aware.
Loss equals pain and suffering and yet it transforms those that experience it. Some respond to pain and suffering by becoming angry, bitter and depressed and saying why me? And others respond more realistically.
They get past the bitterness and grief to a place of why not me? And to a place of acceptance.
As children we are not prepared for this world. We are not told that life is much pain and suffering. We are not told that life is not a bowl of cherries. We are not told that it is ok to fail, break down, be sick and so we are not prepared when life hurls the force of its power at us.
I believe the purpose of life is to know and love ourselves because without that inner realisation nothing else will work.
Pain and loss force us to look inside ourselves. And it is when we know and accept ourselves and become comfortable with reality we can recognise our inner wisdom and accept what life throws at us.