How are you feeling today? Ok? Not ok? You haven’t had time to think about it?
I wanted to write about something positive today and yet I am not feeling very positive at the moment.
My small shih tzu dog has developed a heart murmur and has a problem with her mitral valve and so at the moment I am immersed in anxiety about losing her. Realistically she may live another couple of years if I manage her correctly. And whilst I am trying to stay positive sometimes it is really hard.
Do you find that?
I just read an article that said ’10 ways to boost your positivity’. It left me cold. How can you be positive when all around you is gloom and doom?
Would you say that you were a pessimist or an optimist?
I tend to be an optimist with great big attacks of pessimism!
I am rather wary of people who call me ‘darling’ all the time and smile endlessly and talk consistently about how wonderful their lives are. I am also wary of those self development gurus who tell you that your life will turn around if you would only do 4 simple things like smiling endlessly. Maybe I am getting too bloody old…
We all have down days and up days and today is a down day for me. But whilst I realise that my emotions are all topsy turvy at the moment I know that tomorrow I will begin to feel more optimistic. How do I know this? Because that is my pattern. I stick with the bad and eventually the good will emerge.
Life is not kind to us all the time and whilst I am not going to suggest you dance and smile endlessly, there are ways that we can help ourselves become more positive by protecting ourselves from negative contamination. And there is plenty of that in the world.
You watch the news on the television and the atrocities of war take over your lounge room. You listen to the tales coming out of Europe about the financial crisis and wonder if there is going to be another recession. You read the newspaper and an old lady, you vaguely know, was mugged and is fighting for her life in hospital, and you think that could have been me.
Whilst we have serious concerns about what is happening all around us we are totally powerless to deal with things outside of our immediate experience. And all this negativity and worry stifles any hope we have of being positive, especially when we are feeling low ourselves. It can spiral us down into a dark place that we cannot get out of.
Are you going through some tough times at the moment? Or maybe you have had tough times in the recent past?
Here are 10 tips to help you stay on an even keel when things get too bad:
- Tell your friends and family that you are going through a tough time at the moment. Maybe they can cut you some slack and get off your case for a few days.
- Don’t watch upsetting programmes on the television. Only comedies allowed. You know the little red button on the remote, press it off.
- Don’t buy the newspaper.
- Don’t listen to the endless new stories on the radio.
- Walk away from confrontation. You are not in a state to deal with it now.
- Do something that you have always wanted to do but never did. You’ll have more time now that you’re not watching television.
- Walk your dog, if you haven’t got a dog, go to the nearest dog shelter and volunteer to walk a dog. it will do wonders for your mood and the dog will love you for it.
- Try to mix up with happy people, not super duper positive people, just ordinary folks who will leave you a little happier than they found you.
- If your nearest and dearest are moaning and complaining block your ears and walk away.
- Watch your negative self talk and try to challenge it with more realistic talk.
- Visit an elderly person, or mentor a young person, sometimes when we give to others it makes us feel better within ourselves.